11.30.2005 at 1:08 pm
loved
this is a conversation i had via yahoo messenger with a co-worker earlier today, and it got me to thinking...
friend: i think you are one of the luckiest people i know
me: thanks
friend: i don't really think luck has anything to do with it
me: okay then....so am i still one of the luckiest you know?
friend: not lucky, more like you have been blessed by God and you are perceptive enough to be aware of it.
me: thanks.
what people don't realize is that i remember times like this when chris was ALWAYS gone working or just about to leave for A WHOLE FRIGGIN' MONTH to work in some God-awful place and this when chris was just a plain poo-poo head. everything is relative. if you have nothing to compare the good times to (meaning bad times, and i mean BAD BAD times) then it is extremely simple to take the little things for granted.
and I PROMISE, i do take things for granted. everyone does at some point. but that is one reason i love having a blog. it gives me (as well as chris) perspective on how things are now verses how things were then and allows me to be thankful for what i have. and, if there weren't times like those, would i be so happy now?
the conundrum is: i wasn't happy then. i am happy now. if i was happy then, would i be happy now?
or, does it matter?
...
i do know that no matter how happy i am now, i do not ever want to feel any way other than the way i feel now. safe. happy. complete. LOVED.
xoxo
tell me i'm beautiful...
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