12.23.2007 at 2:57 am
ribbon snapping
i can't sleep.
i HATE not being able to sleep.
i'm going to feel like crap tomorrow because i can't sleep.
*sigh*
there are too many things going through my mind.... that's what's wrong...
my mom and i had an arguement tonight. well, it wasn't really an arguement... it was her telling me that i was snapping at her and that she was getting the impression that i didn't like her. and even though i'm pretty sure that she doesn't think that things like that really bother me.... they do.
immensely.
apparently to the point of not being able to sleep.
did i snap at her?
yes.
why?
the reason isn't important.... the fact that i did shows that i need to change the way i address my mom.
did i appologize?
i tried to. i really tried to. but i got cut off and replied to with a sarcastic comment along with an eye roll.
what did i do?
i left the room and went to my car (thankful that it was already dark outside so that no one else could see my tear stained face) as the tears started to roll down my cheeks.
so next time, what am i going to do differently?
try not to snap at her, or anyone else for that matter.
it's a defense mechanism... when i feel as though the person i am talking with is judging me or belittling me, i snap at them.
but is that an excuse for making my mother feel the way she does?
no...
the sad thing is... she's my mom. there really is no excuse at all.
i've just got to do better next time.
and on a happier note...
janie and i finished wrapping presents tonight last night (i forgot what time it is...). she helped me put the sticky bows on some of the presents.
let me say this...
i HATE sticky bows.
i think they are cheap and ugly. especially the kind that come 50 in a bag for $2.99 at wal-mart. but...if i hate them so much, why do i have so many?
because they didn't bother me a while back. i was very content to stick one of those suckers on a gift that i just spent 10 minutes wrapping (because i have gift wrapping ocd), trying very hard to pick one that actually matched the color of the paper.
but for the past couple of years, the majority of the bows that adorn gifts that come from this house have had fabric ribbons instead of plastic bows.
why would i painstakingly wrap a present, sometimes 2 or 3 times just to make it perfect, and then stick an ugly cheap bow on it?
only because my daughter wants to help so very much... and i couldn't turn her down...
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| WrappingPr |
xoxo
tell me i'm beautiful...
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