05.14.2007 at 8:27 am
time for a change
chris got to spend all weekend at home. he left heading back to panama city around 6 or so. janie and i loaded into the car and headed to nana&pop�s house (as always). we talked about all the fun stuff we had done all weekend long. janie seemed to be more demanding than normal, but nothing too out of the ordinary.
she needed her neb-treatment, and since she had been acting so worse-than-normal (remember, she�s only 3) i decided to take her home to do the treatment. i needed to go by wal-mart before going home (and if i realized that her behavior at that moment was only a glimpse of what was to come, i would have made a b-line for the house).
once we got to wal-mart, she refused to get into the buggy. it is very hard to force a strong-willed child to do much of anything in public if you do not want to get DHR called.
and i am pretty sure that my child knows this some how. after her yelling, stomping, yelling some more, i got her into the buggy. only by bribing her, though. the sucker that i gave her did not last nearly long enough. i was on the far side of the store in relation to the door when the sucker was gone.
�gone,� she said. her blue eyes glaring at me as to say �it�s gone. now i can do whatever i want - plus i am now hyped up on sugar!�
she wanted to stand up in the buggy. which, i could not allow. it�s too dangerous.
this fight went on through the rest of our shopping trip. once we got out of the store (FINALLY) i broke down into tears. because as soon as i took hold of her arm and squeezed it to get her to look me in the eye, she screamed �I WANT MY DADDY!�
the child is not stupid. she knew that her daddy was gone to work.
tears rolled down my cheeks as if someone had just told me that one of my parents had just passed away.
i was a complete basketcase.
i don�t know if i have ever written in here about janie being anything other than good� actually, i think i remember her acting somewhat like this when she was on prednisone.
but this time, the medicine is not to blame.
i cannot have a child that will not act correctly in public. and the bad thing is, i have done it to her. i was so worried when she was younger that she would throw a fit in the store, any store, that i would go out of my way to not take her with me. or i would just not go.
*sigh*
i am tired. janie is in the tub. her treatment is done. she�s taken all of her allergy medication for the night. i am sitting on the floor in the hallway with my laptop so that i can see her in the tub but not be close enough that i will get the computer wet.
my mission this week is to re-train my child. she should act better in public. heck, she should act better in general. she does not (usually) act like this at daycare. and once i turned on my teacher-voice to her, she has acted differently. i have stood my ground. since i regained my composure from crying my eyes out in the wal-mart parking lot, that is.
it is time for a change.
xoxo
tell me i'm beautiful...
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