09.07.2005 at 12:27 pm
God only knows where
without me even noticing it, i have become very use to the fact that chris is now home all the time. ...by all the time, i mean working so close to home that he can come home every night...which is something that has never happened before that i can recall. he has been working at this particular job at the sweetener plant (they make splenda) for g.a. west & co. for just over a month now. our lives have become much less complicated since then. i have felt much less resentment towards him and i think now he is seeing how raising a child alone be harder than he thought it was.
but here's the thing...i didn't think i would get use to it....you know? and that worries me. yesterday that was a message on the answering machine about a job with his old construction company in God-only-knows-where. when i heard that message my heart jumped because it scared me so much. i know that this job close to home is not going to last forever....construction never does. and i know that i will have to face him leaving yet again to go to another construction job God-only-knows-where. but i want to put that off as long as we can.
now, who would want to leave such a precious little girl as this?....
xoxo
tell me i'm beautiful...
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